A New Way to Dull the Anticipation of Disappointment… Abundance; and a Google Spreddy for Ya.

I just submitted for an opportunity I care about a lot. Like a lot. I think part of successfully navigating career growth is a numbers game. Particularly if you are like me and seem to be a slow burner- or a late bloomer; I’m not sure yet I’ll tell you when I have bloomed. 

One of the ways I have managed getting numbers up is by streamlining my applications; cannibalising old ones to serve new purposes. More chances of success that way. Some were a stretch, some not my ultimate goal but defo on the bucket list, and some just made sense. It’s hardly a revolutionary idea; others have been doing this for longer than me; they do it better and more efficiently. 

For me it’s a way to practise not getting too attached to outcomes. It’s been serving my numbers game well while helping me sidestep my past tendency to despair over disappointments.  I mean what doesn't kill you makes you sensitised to future "traumas, and greatly increase your chances of developing post-traumatic stress disorder or depression.” 

Anyway, this opportunity. I really want it, and I bloody went for it like I haven't really let myself in a while! 

I’ve even been ambitious enough to let the words, ‘I’m the one to beat’ come out of my mouth as I describe my plans to friends. I really worked this application; didn't save time by cannibalising others; tried to think fresh, speaking honestly about what I’d like to achieve were there no limitations;  wrestled with the actuality of pitching myself as ‘the one to beat’, with a vision to the future and my vital role in it. 

I hit submit and texted a friend something along the lines of: Going after a thing you want is rubbish. Do. Not. Recommend. 

Ya see, I am grappling with the anticipation of a potential 'no;’ and the despair that could come hot on its heels. I for sure have thicker skin than before, yet the threat of disappointment has still got its festering claws in me.

During times like these it behoves me to embrace the concept of abundance. A notion I was reminded of recently at the Blue Mountains Writers Festival, where First Nations speakers discussed the concept of abundance as part of our dreamtime and lore. It was a nice bit of synchronicity that got me thinking about the scarcity mindset that often permeates performance making.

Before I go further it’s crucial to acknowledge that there are real structural issues contributing to scarcity in our industry that require attention and dedication to address. However, some days the only thing I really have any control over is the ‘tude. So today I embrace abundance. There is enough for me and there is enough for everyone. Do we not come from the land a-plenty?

In an effort to contribute to a more abundant mindset, I'm keen to share a resource. A public Google spreadsheet filled with monthly deadlines for submission opportunities in the realm of writing and performance making.* It's my attempt to foster a community that not only embraces abundance but actively contributes to it.

Most of it will be writing opportunities, as that’s the bulk of what I already have listed. I will keep adding to it with submissions that encompass; project development, space residencies, programming deadlines, opportunities for upskilling, and industry networking. I'll try to highlight submissions with a fee attached, but I also believe that unpaid opportunities can be significantly beneficial. 

Feel free to explore the spreadsheet and, better yet, submit any opportunities you come across using this form. If heaps of us acknowledge our plenty and share what we've got, I reckon that's a good way to build resilience: and prepare ourselves to go after the structural scarcity that limits us. 

I hope spring is treating you well and, as the year winds down you are not anticipating too many disappointments of your own.

*Credit and a big heartfelt nod to VIMH /Liv Satchelle who has had an open source spreddy like this for years. It’s Melbourne/VIC focused but has plenty of interstate ops as well. She is amazing; please visit her website and cross reference her database here. Also a big legacy thank you to Legs on the Wall/Josh Thomas who made a concerted effort to share all the abundance of space and time they had even as their funding was slashed during the Brandis cuts. A lesson I am trying to honour.